Coloring and Meditation

Have I ever told you that I get bored quickly! You see, I’m one of those who would try anything to keep their mind busy and ignore nuisance that life brings from time to time. I have mild anxiety level that can jump to 200% in a matter of seconds, and yup, after all these years of fighting this along with depression, stress and coping with what lives brings to our doors each day, I have developed pyrosis (I’m mentioning this now as I’m literally in constant pain and coughing episodes that nothing so far is making it getting better).

However, on a positive note, if you can see one actually, humor and indifference helped me cope with many of these things, specially depression. So what does this have to do with coloring! ok, bare with me for a moment. You see, I finally received Alllie Brosh’s book “Hyperbole and a half” and if you have read this book before, she is actually speaking your mind! The way she articulates depression is so impressive! I gotta say, I might not have the same experiences as she has but the same struggle everyday or as Emil Cioran puts it “The pessimist has to invent new reasons to exist every day: he is a victim of the “meaning” of life“! and that sums up everything!


Talking about meaning of life, I guess this question keeps popping up in my head every couple of years! You see, again, I get bored quickly, loose meaning in life, why to keep going, what makes you happy, I don’t feel happy easily, sometimes I just can’t be happy or be positive or hopeful all the time! The only thing that keeps me going everyday is my faith and that’s only. I only have faith in God and not in humans and sense I can’t relate much to them or feel happy with them I use humor as a way to create joy and jokes to laugh about! now you are understanding me (only exceptions are those that I do really love and care about that makes me really deep down happy).

Back to depression, reading this book made me seriously depressed or at least reminded me with my miserable inner world. When I first started studying psychology, the only school of thinking that resonates the most with me was the Existential school of therapy, specifically it started with Viktor Frankl and the meaning of life school of thinking. I read Freud, Adler and Frankl was the only one to have a place in my heart to relate to and for a long time. I learned and practiced Gestalt and also have been on the pursuit of meaning in everything I experience and would create my own meanings if I failed to realize it in these things. However, I get bored quickly, I would become more detached than before and will have my dark moments of extreme depression, anxiety and insomnia. (You can learn more if you explored the topics in this link).

But life is never expected or is not always predictable (if you are used to mind-reading or over-analyzing or always_expect_the_worse_never_be_happy_when_good_things_happen)! I buy lots of books from Bookdepository and I always see coloring books as the latest trends for adults, however, never felt so intrigued to actually buy one until I received a number of coloring bookmarks and it just hit me! I grabbed coloring pencils and kept coloring all night long, even at work! the feeling of accomplishment and the need to focus, think creatively to mix colors together and actually utilize your whole brain cells in one task made me feel like euphoria! my hands hurt after all but the next step was to order this coloring book 🙂


and coloring is used as a form of therapy as they mention in the following video o_O

Back to anxiety, so Rollo May, an existential therapist argues in his book “The Meaning of Anxiety” that “Meeting with anxiety can free us from boredom and sharpen our perception, if there is anxiety, there is life”! Well this is a very big argument to make specially to those who suffers from anxiety. I mean, yes, you might be experimenting like what I just did with coloring, you might be freed from boredom sometimes as you are constantly occupied with something, however, it is definitely not something I do agree with 100%, 99% maybe o_O



Documentaries Once again!

One of the most enjoyable experiences I have is when I sit with my parents and watch a documentary. I think we are doing this ritual for ages that I can’t remember when we had started.

What’s nice about my parents is that we share lots of common tastes and activities that we do together. From watching National Geographic with its different channels to the BBC 2 and Al Jazeera Documentary or those that I download to watch together.

Science documentaries are the most common documentaries to watch. I have a bunch of them I can’t even remember how many I watched, mostly however, are BBC documentaries. These are some of science documentaries that intrigued my mind to explore the vast universe:

Everything and Nothing (2 Episode series, 2011) by Jim Al-Khalili


“Two-part documentary which deals with two of the deepest questions there are – what is everything, and what is nothing? In two episodes, Professor Jim Al-Khalili searches for an answer to these questions as he explores the true size and shape of the universe and delves into the amazing science behind apparent nothingness. EVERYTHING: The first part, Everything, sees Professor Al-Khalili set out to discover what the universe might actually look like. The journey takes him from the distant past to the boundaries of the known universe. Along the way he charts the remarkable stories of the men and women who discovered the truth about the cosmos and investigates how our understanding of space has been shaped by both mathematics and astronomy. NOTHING: Explores science at the very limits of human perception, where we now understand the deepest mysteries of the universe lie. Jim Al-Khalili sets out to answer one very simple question – what is nothing? His journey ends with perhaps the most profound insight about reality that humanity has ever made. Everything came from nothing. The quantum world of the super-small shaped the vast universe we inhabit today, and Jim Al-Khalili can prove it.”

I have watched these two episodes many times, worth all your time.

Wonders of Brian Cox Series


I stumbled upon this series a while ago and when I found out that there is a series of books out there for this made me puzzled! However, this series was a little bit expensive for me so one day I will save enough money to buy it 😉

However, the series (or at least the Wonders of the Universe series) is available at the BBC Store and it is more affordable to buy and download.

Other interesting series:

BBC Horizon on science and philosophy


“Horizon tells amazing science stories, unravels mysteries and reveals worlds you’ve never seen before.”

Planet Earth by BBC


“David Attenborough celebrates the amazing variety of the natural world in this epic documentary series, filmed over four years across 64 different countries.”

Harvard Business Reviews: Think about it!


I have subscribed to HBR a couple of years ago. I recall my boss sending me some articles to read and recommended that I subscribe to it. At the time, most of my subscriptions included websites like Lifehacker, Gizmodo, Engadget and TechCrunch. Yup, all techie related stuff.

HBR seemed to be a good fit to my new role, something that I could benefit from whenever I had a window to read. The nice thing about it is that it gives you a variety of options along with very catchy titles. Small snippets here and there on concepts and stuff that are very appealing to explore and leads you eventually to know how to select a good read. Also, you can read HBR Magazine on Kindle.

Now after my subscription to Audible, I found a new feature released recently called Channels. HBR obviously, is on the list! from 5 minutes talks to hours, you can explore a number of different topics on the whim! if you are driving or traveling, this sounds like a good companion for the journey!


Cyberactivism Documentaries


I’m not sure if I ever posted about this before, I talk a lot on different platforms so I no longer sure what I say where and when O_o

Nevertheless, I watch lots of documentaries, you can say that part of my passion is to watch documentaries on almost anything, but mainly, on technology, politics and the interwoven relationship between the both. This is a list of interesting documentaries were made on different topics, from whistleblowing, to investigative journalism, hacking, the dark web and the internet. As usual, this is a never-ending list that will keep growing until… who knows when ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Lets start with:

Citizenfour, 2014


After Laura Poitras received encrypted emails from someone with information on the government’s massive covert-surveillance programs, she and reporter Glenn Greenwald flew to Hong Kong to meet the sender, who turned out to be Edward Snowden.


We Steal Secrets: The Story of Wikileaks, 2013


Filmmaker Alex Gibney examines the case of Julian Assange and WikiLeaks, and how their actions have changed the way democratic societies deal with privacy, secrecy and the right to information.
Filmmaker Brian Knappenberger documents the inner workings and beliefs of the hacking group Anonymous.
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On September 17 2011, a worldwide social movement was born in New York City. This film documents who they are and what they protest.
TPB AFK: The Pirate Bay Away From Keyboard is a documentary film released on 8 February 2013, directed by Simon Klose, based on the lives of the three founders of The Pirate Bay: Peter Sunde, Fredrik Neij and Gottfrid Svartholm.
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Filmmaker Brian Knappenberger explores the life and work of programming prodigy and information activist Aaron Swartz.
Inside the Dark Web turns to the topic of internet surveillance concerning the pros and cons of the ability for everything that passes over the immense World Wide Web being able to be watched, recorded, and analyzed.
Virtual Revolution charts two decades of profound change since the invention of the World Wide Web, weighing up the huge benefits and the unforeseen downsides.
Filmmaker Cullen Hoback exposes the erosion of online privacy and what information governments and corporations are legally taking from citizens each day.
Experts on and survivors of cyberbullying discuss its rise in occurrence and suggest ways to put an end to it.

نقد الليبرالية للطيب بوعزة


من المهم بمكان الاتفاق على تأصيل فكري وفلسفي لمعنى الحرية قبل الانتقال الى محاولة فهم الفكر أو الفلسفة الليبرالية وذلك بسبب جنوح الكثيرين الى اختزال الفكر الليبرالي بالدعوة الى الحرية متناسين النشأة التاريخية والقيمية لليبرالية كفلسفة أو أيدولوجيا يتم الدعوة اليها كأنها الحل الأوحد أو الحتمية النهائية للتاريخ.

إن الحرية كفعل أو إطار قيمي يتمركز بالأساس على مقدرة الإنسان على الإختيار وما يترتب عليها من حالة إدراك ووعي وإرادة ورغبة تتجاوز الحتمية الموضوعية التي تحكم عالم الأشياء (كما يسميها مالك بن نبي) أو العالم البراني (كما يسميها علي عزت بيجوفيتش) أو الطبيعة. ومن هنا يمكننا القول أنه لا يوجد هناك حرية مطلقة فهي بالأساس حرية مقيدة أولاً بسبب انتمائنا أو وجودنا في عالم مادي تحكمه حتميات وجودية تتمثل بدوران الأرض حول الشمس مثلاً أو أننا نتنفس الهواء كي نعيش. كل هذه المحددات لا تنتمي بالضرورة الى الفعل الأخلاقي أو القيمي الذي ينتمي اليه فعل الحرية لكن هي حتميات لا يمكن تجاوزها بالضرورة.

ثَم هنالك أيضاً عوالم أخرى تحكم فعل الحرية وهي العالم الجواني كما يسميها علي عزت بيجوفيتش وهي نزعتنا المستمرة نحو تلك القيم العليا أو المقدسة، نحو فعل الإختيار والإرادة والرغبة. هذه النزعة أو التوق المستمر نحو فعل الاختيار سواء نحونا الى الحقيقة في طلبنا للعلم أو الجمال في طلبنا للفن ونحوها هي طبيعة جبلية خُلق عليها الإنسان أو ما نسميه نحن فطرية التدين. فكل هذه الأفعال هي بالضرورة تكّمل وعينا بوجود قوة أكبر منا قادرة على الفعل.

ومما يزيد من نسبية الحرية وعدم إطلاقها هو انتمائها ونسبتها للإنسان. فعلاقة الإنسان بالإنسان مبنية بالأساس على فعل ناقص لا يكمّله الا انطلاقنا نحو المقدس نحو الله وهي العلاقة التي تمنحه صفة الكمال. أما من ناحية سوسيولوجية (اجتماعية) فنسبية الحرية تنطلق فعلاً من انتمائها الى إطار محدد يتمثل بالييئة أو الموروث الثقافي لأي مجتمع انساني. وإن أردنا مقاربة أكثر واقعية للتباين والتمايز بين المجتمعات وبالتالي نسبيتها وعدم إطلاقها هو ما أورده مالك بن نبي من مقاربة بين قصة إبن طفيل حي بن يقظان وقصة روبنسون كروزو.

ففي قصة حي بن يقظان، يجد حي نفسه بعد نفوق الغزالة أسال في حالة توجه مستمر الى عالم الأفكار الى ماهية الروح والفكر متدرجاً في الوصول الى فكرة الإله والتي بها يتغلب حي على وحدته. بينما قصة روبنسون كروزو نجد توجه مستمر نحو عالم المادة والمتمثل بالعمل وكيفية إيجاد سبل الاستمرارية والحياة. ان المقاربة بين هاتين القصتين يوضحان البون الشاسع بين الفكر الشرقي والغربي النابعين من موروث تاريخي وثقافي وحضاري كبير لا يمكن تجاوزه بالأساس.

بالعودة الى الطيب بوعزة، من خلال هذه الدراسة المتعمقة بالفكر الليبرالي، ينطلق بوعزة في نقده لهذه الفلسفة بناءاً على منهجية مردها:
1- مقاربة فلسفية للأسس المعرفية والمفاهيمية لليبرالية.
2- مقاربة تاريخية وسوسيولوجية للنسق الليبرالي المجتمعي.

ويخلص هنا الى تعريف الليبرالية على أنها “فلسفة اقتصادية وسياسية ترتكز على أولوية الفرد بكونه كائناً حراً”. فبعد دراسة الفكر الليبرالي تاريخياً على أيدي منظريه المتضارب على ما يبدو فيما بينهم، تبين أن أساس ظهور هذا الفكر هو دخول الثورة الصناعية ومحاولة تحرير الشعب من سيطرة الإقطاعيين حتى يتم استغلالهم في المصانع. “فالليبرالية لم تنشأ كتأكيد لحرية الانسان، بل نتيجة الحاجة الى استغلاله بطرق مغايرة للاستغلال القناني، طرق جديدة تناسب الثورة الصناعية”. والأمثلة على هذا كثيرة ابتداءاً من ابادة الهنود الحمر وليس اتهاءاً باستعمار شعوب افريقيا.

بعد وضع الليبرالية في اطارها التاريخي، يمكن مناقشة الجوانب السياسية والاقتصادية منها كما يلي:
النظرة السياسية: بعد مناقشة وتحليل كل من ميكافيلي وجون لوك ومونتيسيكيو، نخلص الى ما يلي:
1- الفصل بين السياسي والأخلاقي، بحيث تنحصر السياسية بنظرة مادية شيئية بعيدة عن القيمية والغائية أي أنها قائمة على أساس المصلحة المرتبط تحديداً بالمنفعة الخالصة للفعل السياسي.
2- الرؤية الذرية للوجود الاجتماعي، أي أنها قائمة على أساس الفردية ومجموع قيم الأفراد مقابل قيمة الجماعة.
3- النزوع نحو تحرير الفرد، والفرد المقصود هنا هو الفرد المالك ذو الدلالة الاقتصادية، أي أصحاب رأس المال.

* يعتبر هذا الفصل من الفصول الدسمة فكرياً وفلسفياً، ويمكن الاحالة على سلسلة دروس العدالة من جامعة هارفارد للوقوف على النظرة الفلسفية والأخلاقية لهؤلاء. سعيدة بمشاركة من يرغب بحضور هذه السلسلة ومناقشتها  🙂

النظرة الاقتصادية: ويمكن تلخيصها بكون الانسان كائن اقتصادي بحيث يتم تأطير الانسان بنمط مادي يحكم تفكيره وتصوراته ووجوده بالأساس. تم هنا مناقشة أفكار أدم سميث بما يخص اقتصاد السوق ورأس المال. ويمكن أن نخلص من هذا الفصل بالقول أن الفسلفة الليبرالية قائمة على المنفعة الخالصة كما قام برسم معالمها كل من بنتام وجون ستيوارت ميل.

* أحيل هنا الى كتابي جون ستيوارت ميل “عن الحرية” و”النفعية” لمن أراد الاستزادة عن هذا الفكر.

النيوليبرالية أو الليبرالية الجديدة: ومن أهم مدارسها المدرسة النمساوية ومدرسة لوزان ومدرسة كمبردج. وبدراسة هذه المدارس خلص الطيب الى أن “المشروع النيوليبرالي لا يهدف الى تحرير الانسان، بل تحرير الرأسمال الاقتصادي من كل قيد، بما فيه قيد القيم، وتحجيم سلطة الدولة لتتصرف القوة الاقتصادية كما تشاء”. أو كما يقول دوغورناي دعه يعمل دعه يمر.

ويختم أطروحته بالحديث عن الخطاب الليبرالي العربي وهو كما قد توصلت اليه مسبقاً هو خطاب يخلو من أي نقد أو تطوير ويتبنى هذا الأفكار المقولبة جاهزاً بدون أدنى وعي تاريخي وقيمي لهذه الأيدولوجية. وهي دعوة قائمة أيضاً على التخلي عن الفكر الأوروبي والذي يضع حقوق الانسان كحجر أساس في منظومته الفكرية (وهنا لا بد أن نذكّر أن حقوق الانسان في الفكر الغربي قائمة بالأساس على إلزامية قانونية أكثر منها أخلاقية وبالتالي فهي لا تختلف بالأساس عن علمانية الفكر الغربي القائم على فصل الفعل السياسي والاقتصادي عن الفكر الأخلاقي) والتأكيد فقط على الفكر الأمركي حتى لو جاء على ظهر دبابة في سبيل تحقيقه (ولنا في صندوق النقد الدولي وقفة هنا أيضاً ).

خلاصة قول الطيب بوعزة هو نقد مقولة الفيلسوف الأمريكي فوكوياما أن الليبرالية تمثل نهاية التاريخ وأنها صيرورة حتمية لجميع العالم، وأنه ما دام هناك فكر وعقل ينقد سيأتي اليوم الذي سوف تنهار بها هذه الفلسفة كما انهارت من قبلها الماركسية والشيوعية لانفصالها عن روح التاريخ وانفصالها عن القيم والموروث الشعبوي للأمم والشعوب.

وأختم بما قاله الرافعي: “الدّين حرية القيد لا حرية الحرية، فأنت بعد أن تقيد رذائلك وضراوتك وشرّك وحيوانيتك – أنت من بعد هذا حر ما وسعتك الأرض والسماء والفكر، لأنك من بعد هذا مكمِّل للإنسانية، مستقيم على طريقته”!

* عن الحرية:
** النفعية:
*** Justice Harvard Series:

Gaming and Addiction!

Every now and then, I get addicted to a new game! I guess that’s maybe because it makes you focus on one thing, one goal and accomplishing that goal! it all started back from the days of AX-170 Computer (a.k.a Computer Sakhr), a Kuwaiti computer that was targeting the Arab community. I can’t recall the exact date of when we got that one, but I remember being fascinated by the drawing tool in it :).. by the way, we still have it!


After that, we used to play on the Family Atari, and boy, that was something! I guess I enjoyed the car racing game the most, it was like really big thing! the canon that shoots monkeys and the airplanes one!… memories! I can’t remember how many times the hand was ruined and I guess this one ended up being sold to junk collectors!


I can’t remember what came first, the Nintendo games or Microsoft 95. My head is missed up around this era, however, for the Nintendo game, Super Mario was the hit, an epic game that was and still my favorite. Even my Mom played that game! we used to play against each other at house and against cousins and uncles and we were professional players! we would reach the final stage in the game without losing any soul! those days were the golden age!


When we first bought Windows 95 and later on Windows 98, it was all about games! I can’t remember how many games we played on these two! from Tomb raider to Fifa 98, Need for Speed the initial versions. We were pro! proud ones. I used to beat the hell out of my two brothers and it was lots of fun! in Fifa, my brothers hated playing against me as I was a real pro and never left a chance to tease them about me ‘the girl’ beating them 😀




Add to that, Windows 2000, XP and moving forward! My favorite games would be Need for Speed all versions, Call of Duty all versions too! Fifa all versions, Tennis and the great Grand Theft Auto GTAaaaaa 😀

Play station and Nintendo Wii! we have a Nintendo Wii at the office and I spent half an hour trying to connect it to the TV and make it working. Once it was flashing there on the screen I was so full of myself 😀 but then I found that the controllers were not working so!




My latest obsession is this! I’m all wrapped up around this and I’m improving over time and bought a bada** bike =D


Another one that is similar to this and yup, it is a car racer 😀


And the Adrenaline rush we are having when we play Despicable Me!

Despicible Me 2

And this one but… MEH! I didn’t go beyond the first Island I was not really hooked up to it!


Board Games!

Yes, these are my ultimate obsession I guess! It is rare to find someone who enjoys them but I do a lot! and wish to find someone who share my same obsessions 😥





My Favorite, Ticket to Ride,




top that with any card game, I’m all up for it 🙂 Am I a gaming addict, well.. I don’t think so.. yet O_o